One last Zoe picture

Aug. 14th, 2025 08:51 am
bill_schubert: (Default)
[personal profile] bill_schubert
Zoe took over the Friendly Computers business in about 2005, not too long after we opened. Once she was big enough she was there every day greeting customers and making sure we were all on task. We had one customer who was scared by Zoe's presence and said 'your dog got out'. We didn't bother to tell her that she was the intruder into Zoe's shop. But obviously Zoe's job was to calm the people who were bringing in their computers and were anxious about it. She did her job well.

When we first got her (or vice versa) she fit in the palm of my hand. As a half pound puppy she was a terror. So aggressive (she had a lot of rottweiler and pit bull and was growing quickly) that I decided on the first day that she was going to some serious training. She did. She went away to a two week camp during which she learned constraint and became glued to her alpha human which was me. It was a great way for us to go since she spent so much time in our shop.

My step son worked with us at the time and took the only surviving picture of her. This was back in the fairly early days of photo manipulation and he was playing around with it. This was Zoe as we first saw her:

Baby zoe

Things are returning to our new normal now. I think Toby is confused but he will forget and move on. He was happier with another dog in the house and, sometime in the not so distant future, I may foster some dogs if I can figure that out. But for the moment he is an only child.

Today is a nothing to do day and I am participating fully.

I need to make some Prolific money. Dying is expensive. I've got all the costs covered but had to dip into investments to do it so we need to pull back on the finance throttle for a while and get some money back in the account.

Fortunately prices have come WAY DOWN and there is NO inflation so it will be easy.

(no subject)

Aug. 13th, 2025 11:01 pm
southernmedicine: (Default)
[personal profile] southernmedicine
Things still aren't all put away and organized, as I'm still unpacking and sorting and re-arranging, but for the most part we're settled. We've been cooking meals together for dinner every night, going for walks with the dog, and watching episodes of Clone Wars every night before bed. It's... good. It's real good.

I was telling Blair the other day that I feel like my life has begun a new season: new set, some reoccurring characters, but mostly a new cast, and a new plot.

I was hoping to have begun working by now, but unfortunately the hiring manager at this clinic I want to work at has been dragging her feet and not returning my texts. I called the clinic direct the other day to try and talk to her, and she said they've just been really busy but that she would text me with information on when I could come in sometime this week. I said great, can't wait! Tomorrow is Thursday, and no text yet. Meanwhile my funds are dwindling fast, because moving across the country utterly devastated my bank account, and it took a lot for us to get started. Blair's mom gave us a couple hundred dollars for the basic necessities, but holy shit it went fast. Kitchen stuff in particular is dumb expensive, man!

But we've met some of the neighbors, and they seem... interesting.

We are hosting an in-person DnD session this weekend, so that should be nice.

Slowly getting back into watching this huge backlog of things in my open tabs. Begun the new season of Project Runway, and excited to watch Eddington. We went to the movies the other night for our first date in the new location, and saw Together, which was utterly bizarre (in a good way).

Would love to write again someday, ahahahaha. Yeah. Remember Fandom Trumps Hate? I do! Every day! I used to have plenty of time, but now, somehow, it's mid-August. Oh my god.

Driving theory test tomorrow

Aug. 13th, 2025 09:53 pm
cimorene: A woman sitting on a bench reading a book in front of a symmetrical opulent white-and-gold hotel room (studying)
[personal profile] cimorene
I've mentioned before that our van is a 1999 Citroën Berlingo. We named him Bernie because he's an old white guy. Bernie was a white van man's van: he belonged to a company for twenty years and sat in their warehouse being taken care of, but mostly not used, so he was in practically mint condition when we bought him in 2019, but he only cost 2000€. Now contemporary Finnish driving education is teaching me about safety features that are common or required in modern-day cars that he doesn't have: traction and skid control, smart cruise control, side door airbags that you can disable in the back, front and rear fog lights, a screen that recommends which gear to use, warning messages when you exceed the detected speed limit.

Obviously a 1999 van doesn't have any of those. But [personal profile] waxjism has also been scaring me for weeks saying he's too old to have anti-lock brakes, but today I finally read the manual and he is not. He has anti-lock brakes! That one was the only one that was seriously upsetting (the car I learned to drive in didn't have any of the others: it was a 1993 Buick Skylark).

I have to get up early to go to Turku to take the driver's license theory test tomorrow, and today I took the practice theory test again as soon as I got back from my last driving simulator lesson, and failed with the worst score I've gotten on the practice tests yet (42/50 "situation" questions). Then I took it again immediately and passed with a perfect score for the first time.

I've taken the practice test 7 times in all, but I've also gone through all the practice question sets, which amounts to 60 tests' worth of situation questions and 40 tests' worth of verbal questions (with repetition!), and I have consequently pretty much been at saturation for a while. I can't predict whether I will miss situation questions when I do a set, but that's not because I haven't learned the material, it's because the questions are not at all like a situation you actually encounter while driving; they're more like a sort of Where's Waldo-esque detailed visual search game plus logic puzzle. About half the time I miss them because of something like not noticing that the car is on a priority road (when the sole clue that it's a priority road is the tiny triangular edge of the sign with 80% of the sign cropped off on the extreme edge of the image blending into the windows of an apartment building in the background) or not noticing that it's on a one-way street (when the sole clue that it's a one-way street is some painting on the road facing the wrong way that you can only see if you look in the left side mirror image but it's very small). So I just have to take methylphenidate and count breaths and try to make sure I take my time. And try not to get distracted.

(After the theory test I still have driving lessons in a real car, and then the driving test.)
cimorene: A very small cat peeking wide-eyed from behind the edge of a blanket (tristana)
[personal profile] cimorene
Tristana never misses an opportunity to eat hair. She can't have toys with feathers, and she has to be watched like a hawk when I'm brushing or grooming bunnies, because she will stalk the balls of discarded fur with a surprising amount of tenacity and sneakiness. She frequently manages to steal tiny tufts of bunny fur from the edges of doorways that Rowan passes through (which always accumulate a small fringe of faintly-waving fronds every few days if I don't clean them off), but since bunny grooming is a discrete activity that requires a lot of attention, it is usually possible to simply carry the fur away and put it in a closed trash can that she can't reach without incident (although there have been past incidents with her stealing fur from the trashcan, but she's never managed to get very much).

So half an hour ago Tristana started being both extremely distressed and moderately distressing: cw: vomit )

(When picturing a ping-pong-sized ball of fur, recall that Tristana, while fully grown, is tiny. She was a runt and never fully made up for two weeks as an infant when she didn't gain weight. She weighed 2.3 kg or about 5 lb last year, and she is slim and wiry, the typical bundle-of-twigs/greyhoundish Oriental breed build.)

She's finished regurgitating now, and we put a bowl of clean water and the turtle bed, opened up so she could crawl inside, on the heated floor of the upstairs bathroom for her, and she immediately slunk in there to think about her misfortunes. I mean, to feel sorry for herself, not to analyze; I doubt she has any idea the fur-eating was related to her current distress.

But backing up to about midday today, earlier I had brushed Rowan and then neatly rolled up the excess fluff into a ball like I always do; but instead of carrying it into the kitchen and hiding it in the trash under the sink where Tristana couldn't get it, I left it on top of the trashcan because I was going to come right back and use the same trashbag to change the liners in the bunny litterboxes. I was going to put the soiled paper on top of the fur, so it would have been just as inaccessible. However, I got distracted and forgot.

So this is actually kind of an ADHD tax.

It all went well as it could

Aug. 11th, 2025 05:36 pm
bill_schubert: (Default)
[personal profile] bill_schubert
The doc was wonderful as expected. She was professional and compassionate and efficient.

The timing was good. Zoe had gotten very quickly to the point that it was very hard for her to lie down. Her back leg joints just didn't bend. I had to help her lie down the last time. No resistance. She was tired of being in pain and didn't want her breakfast.

I put her in a bag bought for the purpose (from Amazon, of course) and loaded her into the car. We went to A&M and they took her away.

Of the five senses I don't really have a taste for Zoe but there are holes in the other four. Sight, sound, smell and touch all have a huge empty place in them and I'll be listening and looking and reaching out for a long time.

Dylan, Zoe's predecessor, was the same. It took me years to get over not hearing his collar or not seeing him come around the corner.

There is a Buddhist arm called Tonglen part of which has you thinking of that person you know that you love purely, without reservation and to feel that love and connect with it during meditation. If you can't think of a person with whom you have no contention, an animal will do.

So I meditated on Zoe. Many times.

It will all pass. Missing Dylan did.

I found myself furious at the dog sanctuary for becoming a center of conflict so that I can't spend time there now. It would help a lot. But that door is shut and I don't want to reopen it.

Something will come down the road. Dylan walked up to the car driven by my now ex wife while she was in Monroe, LA and asked if she needed a dog. He was near death and had all kinds of problems but became a great travellor and sailor and military dog.

One day we were in the shop in Georgetown about 15 years ago and this woman came in with a small furry thing in her hand asking if we needed a dog.

I've never had a problem finding the right dog at the right time.

All for now

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cimorene: Cut paper art of a branch of coral in front of a black circle on blue (coral)
[personal profile] cimorene
I can't get excited about fandom right now, or at least can't find a fandom to get excited about right now, but I can always get excited about the history of the decorative arts.

I've been reading vintage magazines to try to immerse myself more in the worldview, the history, and the language of the period I love most (centered on 1920s, but including the whole between-wars period, the Golden Age of detective fiction, etc), and the last few weeks of browsing and reading Vogue and Harper's Bazar; Ladies' Home Journal, Woman's Home Companion, Pictorial Review, and McCall's; and House Beautiful, Better Homes & Gardens and House & Garden from the 1890s-1930s (on HathiTrust and Internet Archive mostly; there are various websites that collect links to vintage magazines online) have deepend my understanding of the period so much. A lot of that is general information about the period, turns of phrase, discourse style, beauty and graphic design styles, and bits of trivia. But it's also filled in a huge gap that I didn't even really understand was there in my knowledge of the history of decorative arts and design.

I'm super excited about my new understanding of early 20th century romanticism right now. Which is highly related to and mostly the same thing as national romanticism, a trend stretching back to the 19th century; but also an aesthetic and stylistic background that was actually more commonplace, more widespread, than the influence of art deco and art nouveau and midcentury modernism in their respective periods, but is often overlooked when culture looks back. I knew the term "romanticism" in visual arts and design before, of course. In the 19th century it links up with the arts & crafts movement; in the 20s and 30s, my understanding was vaguer: cutesy florals and... folk art? I now know that yes, it was that, but it was so much more than that: it was historical nostalgia expressed in historical eclecticism, the dominant aesthetic being an expression of a cultural obsession with creating and glorifying a personalized, domesticated patriotic past.

It was still very much tied to the project of creating the nation-state, in this case mainly through oodles of mass-produced imitation antique furniture marketed as "early American" or "Tudor" or "Gothic" or "French provincial" or "Empire". (Genuine antiques and reproduction antiques were also popular or at least popularly admired, don't get me wrong; but a great deal of the mass-produced furniture in this period was more about an antique vibe than about any sort of realism - something that was also very much true of the earlier explosion of Victorian-era "revival" styles caused by the initial spread of industrialization and an earlier ballooning of the middle classes. Victorian-produced furniture and design styles are also very much historical eclecticism.) This continued into the midcentury, when the pastiche styles previously called "early American" and "Tudor" had evolved into what was then generally referred to as "Colonial" (they meant American colonial specifically), exemplified by the mid-century modest ranch house's frequent pine kitchen and fake wrought iron and hammered brass hardware. Midcentury American ranches are iconic today, but the national imagination is inclined to populate them with mid-mod and streamline modern in blocks of color and metal-trimmed laminates; but in the period, the pine kitchen and the gingham ruffle were actually far more popular, even at modernism's height.

I'm focusing on American history in this narrative because I'm reading American magazines, but this was happening all over Europe. National romanticism in the 19th century produced a flourishing interest in cultural history and folk art in Europe too, and the same historical-vibe furniture recalling pre-Industrial styles was mass-produced for a growing middle class across Europe in the early 20th century. In Finland and Sweden the style was dominated by Gustavian (early 19th century, neoclassical) and rococo and baroque styles, often simplified, but the Nordic countries were leaders in modernism from the 1930s onwards, which changed the picture somewhat. Dipping into museums and auction sites from Finland and the Scandis brings a strong wind of light woods and simplified forms, painted instead of dark-stained wood, and a healthy admixture of functionalist/Bauhaus styles. And also way more actual crystal and imitation crystal chandeliers. Finns and Swedes fucking love their crystal chandeliers. I can understand their cultural history and dark winters and all that before the invention of electric lighting, but they still need to pump the brakes a bit. Chandeliers do not belong in your kitchen or bathroom, guys.

Focused on the mechanisms

Aug. 11th, 2025 08:15 am
bill_schubert: (Default)
[personal profile] bill_schubert
Zoe was up most of the night. The tramodol is losing its effectiveness, nature's way of enforcing what we know. Had we not made arrangements I'd be a mass of anxiety trying to figure out what to do. But we know and I've made every arrangement I can think of from getting the doc here to making sure the car is full of gas so I can drive straight to the A&M vet hospital when we're ready.

We are contributing to the medicine trial by having Zoe autopsied so they can verify the condition of her heart. It will help in a small way other dogs and families who might want to use the drug she took as part of the trial.

It is a consolation, however small, that she will contribute. And I've made arrangements with a crematorium near the hospital so sometime next week we'll receive her ashes and they will reside on the table behind me with those of Dylan, her predecessor. One day I'll figure out something good to do with them. There are a surprising number of possibilities from jewelry to tree planting. I'll wait until the two of them get together and figure it out.

We went for a very short walk today.  She was trembling by the end and it was only part of a block.  I've given her the remaining tramadol so she will be OK in a bit.  

Some things should last forever.  Now if I can only remember to keep breathing.


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(no subject)

Aug. 10th, 2025 10:50 pm
southernmedicine: (chair)
[personal profile] southernmedicine
Man. Yesterday and today were a long process of getting all of Blair's stuff here. The bad news is, it poured down rain halfway through transport, so everything she had in the back of her dad's truck got drenched. The good news is, it's all over now. We're completely moved, we have all our furniture set up the way we want it, and now we just. Settle in.

I didn't have time to mess with this before, but! Since our journey was the longest road trip I've ever been on, I decided I wanted to play the license plate game, and see how many states I could spot! Blair didn't want to play, but ended up excitedly pointing out states I hadn't spotted yet. It was so cute.

The final tally!

Alabama, Alaska, Arkansas, Arizona, California, Colorado, Delaware, Florida, Georgia, Idaho, Illinois, Indiana, Iowa, Kansas, Kentucky, Louisiana, Maryland, Massachusetts, Michigan, Minnesota, Mississippi, Missouri, Montana, Nebraska, Nevada, New Jersey, New Mexico, New York, North Carolina, North Dakota, Ohio, Oklahoma, Oregon, Pennsylvania, South Dakota, Tennessee, Texas, Utah, Virginia, Wisconsin, Wyoming.

41/50 states! In one road trip. Not bad!

And bonus, Canadian provinces! Alberta, British Columbia, Quebec.
cimorene: cartoony drawing of a woman's head in profile giving dubious side-eye (Default)
[personal profile] cimorene
Every now and then I get a craving like,

"I wish I could read [fandom] the way it was before [subsequent bad canon/creator behavior]."

The thing is, all the stuff I enjoyed the first time I read it is still there, but... it never feels the same. All that Avengers tower fic from 2012 and all that season 1 Teen Wolf fic, for example, actually don't taste the way I remember them tasting.

This is true of a number of foods that I liked as a kid, too. The smell of bacon or hamburger cooking are slightly nauseating to me now that I haven't eaten them in 20 years, but sometimes I still wake up from a dream wishing I could have the bacon cheeseburgers I ate at age 19 from the college dining hall once a week.

So glad the decision is made

Aug. 9th, 2025 09:55 am
bill_schubert: (Default)
[personal profile] bill_schubert
Zoe and Toby and I went for our walk today. Around the block, maybe 20 or so minutes. And Zoe was fine. A little wobbly at times but of course I'm thinking 'hey, she's OK'.  Blocking from my mind the half dozen pills I had to give to her so she would be OK. It is so tempting to just keep going. I've taken survey after survey about quality of life. The Internet is so good for something like this. All of them say the same thing. Her good days and good times aren't frequent enough to justify keeping her around.

But she had such a good walk.

The mind plays dirty tricks.

She was wandering around the house a few minutes ago clearly not knowing what was next on the agenda and I'm reminded that the drugs to keep her from hurting have their cost.

The decision is made and the timing is just as good as it can be.

I am getting ready to head over to a friend's house to drop off something and am reminded of the hundreds upon hundreds of times I would say 'come on' and she'd be right with me in the car. She fit the passenger's seat of the Smart Car perfectly. But then she needed help getting in and then it was obviously really uncomfortable for her to sit in a car at all.  And one day I just stopped bringing her.

So I'll run my errand with her memory in the seat next to me.

Zoe is my second heart dog. The first was Dylan acquired during a previous marriage and a previous life but who made the transition from wife to wife and military career to civilian life with ease.

I read once about a guy who was an Iditarod race and so was used to having lots of dogs. He retired from the race but continued to have lots of dogs. When his pack began to thin he would go to the shelter and say 'give me the next one you intend to kill'.

That's the way to live. I have always envied him. A river of canines flowing through his life. I've had a small stream but am equally grateful.

So it goes.

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cimorene: cartoony drawing of a woman's head in profile giving dubious side-eye (Default)
[personal profile] cimorene
Like oud or something. Not patchouli anyway. Because after shampooing it three times the night before last, I could still smell that on it yesterday every time it got in my face (the physically irritating part of the smell did wash out, but I personally dislike musks and think they're gross even when they don't make me sneeze). I can still smell it today too, but my hair is dry, and I don't want to shampoo it again yet.

So I guess this is no longer directly related to allergies, but I don't have a haircare tag or an "I fucking hate perfume flames on the side of my face" tag.

Up most of the night

Aug. 8th, 2025 07:36 am
bill_schubert: (Default)
[personal profile] bill_schubert
With Zoe. She had a bad night and the tramodol that had been working didn't help. I decided it was time. I've scheduled her for a home visit with a service that specializes in home euthanasia and have talked to Texas A&M about bringing her back to them for an autopsy to round out her participation in their trial. Then we'll get her ashes back.

So this weekend is Zoe weekend. I cancelled my pickleball this morning. She seems happy to be lying down next to me so I'll make sure she can do that all she wants.

The price to pay for 15 years of having a happy shadow.


PXL_20250315_144749002.PORTRAIT~2
cimorene: A small bronze table lamp with triple-layered orange glass shades (stylish)
[personal profile] cimorene
Last night I was joylessly reading until way too late in bed, and then after I put my phone down, I suddenly started to notice my throat hurt a bit.

Now, I do have a perfume allergy that has caused my throat to swell mostly-closed in the past, but only about 5(?)x in the past 20 years, and only after a Lot (the perfume has to be concentrated close to my nose and mouth probably).

And yes, yesterday I had tried a new curl-reviving spray and I had been mildly annoyed by its perfume all day, but it hadn't irritated my nose right away the way dangerous perfumes (and also many others) do.

So when I started to worry that the product was causing an allergic reaction that might make my throat swell closed and kill me in my sleep, this was extremely unlikely for several reasons: the perfume had already proven itself not similar to ones that caused a reaction before, and also that's not really how anaphylaxis works, probably?

But my throat hurt and every perfume I could smell seemed to be aggravating it. So I decided that getting up at 3 am and showering all the perfumed products off would be a better use of my time than going downstairs to take antihistamines, painkillers, and a benzo. I shampooed my hair three times and combed conditioner through it in the shower, then put a folded towel on my pillow and slept on it after towel-drying, without applying my usual leave-in.

My throat feels a little better but still irritated today, and I took loratidine and paracetamol with breakfast. I wonder why my throat got irritated, though. I hope I'm not getting sick, but probably not; the last time I went to the store was Wednesday, so the incubation period for a respiratory infection wouldn't match up very well.

(no subject)

Aug. 6th, 2025 04:05 pm
southernmedicine: (rebel phoenix)
[personal profile] southernmedicine
The final day was not twelve hours. It was, in fact, fifteen, and it was very, very rough. Several gas station fill-ups, a few stops for food (rare in the middle of nowhere, rarer late at night), some wrong turns, and we arrived at Blair's parents' house around 5am yesterday.

We slept all of two hours, then had to get up and go sign all the paperwork for our apartment and get the keys. Then, the office manager gave us a tour of the whole place, and when we were alone, Blair and I cried and she hugged me tight and twirled me around and it was all very sweet.

The journey is over, we have our apartment, but it is currently FILLED with boxes and totes and the next several days will be all about unpacking and sorting and cleaning.

I love our apartment. It is brand new, literally finished getting built in April. Everything is fresh. Everything is new. Pristine. We have a club house, an exercise room, a mail room, a communal area where you can just chill and watch tv and cook, and we have assigned parking spaces inside a nice well-lit parking garage. The place is super secure, too, you need a fob to open ANY door.

I think we're going to be really happy. I still can't believe it.

I crashed for ten hours last night, I was so exhausted from being awake for nearly 48 hours.

Tonight I'm gonna sleep pretty well too, I imagine!

I'm sorry that I haven't been interacting. I've been on the road every single day, and I've been doing about 85% of the driving. We're either driving, doing activities or sleeping, so I haven't read my friends' list at all. I will try to catch up a little soon!
cimorene: Olive green willow leaves on a parchment background (foliage)
[personal profile] cimorene
Benjamin is one of several large and venerable potted plants inherited from Wax's granny, so he's probably older than I am; he has been in front of the east window in the kitchen since we moved here. However, he's had a hard time this spring after Sipuli peed in his pot several times to protest her litter box being smelly.

Once it got warm enough to not shock him in the process, Wax discarded all his old soil, shook and jiggled and rinsed his roots, and repotted him with new soil; and in apology for the trauma of that, she felt obliged to let him stay out for a while (but not fully outside, where the temperature fluctuations and wind and rain would be too much for him).

The thing is... Benjamin hasn't been pruned in a long time, and he's probably about six feet tall and four feet wide, now.

The porch isn't large.

As Wax put it when carrying out the recycling last week, it's not very convenient having your porch half full of tree.

She says she can't bring him inside, though, because he's enjoying himself so much (making lots of new leaves) that it would be mean.
cimorene: SGA's Sheppard and McKay, two men standing in an overgrown sunlit field (pastoral)
[personal profile] cimorene
We live in a tiny town with only one commercial street, but spread out with low population density. Our island of Ålön is about 77 square kilometers (about 44 square miles), and most of it is farms and forests.

My late MIL's summer cottage was fifteen minutes by car out towards one of the corners of the island, in the village of Levo, but what a world of difference! Behind its little orchard stretched fallow and planted fields; across the winding road lay a little forest, and on the other side of that the bay of Finland. (The neighbors gave permission to park extra cars in their field and to use their little scrap of sand and dock for swimming.) The music of the evening in Levo was birdsong and the rushing of the wind.

Here one block behind city hall and the police station, in the village of Parsby, we sit in the midst of urban decay, as mentioned recently. Our little street contains three inhabited houses and two abandoned wrecks that the city owns and is allowing to fall into public health hazards, with asbestos everywhere, roofs caving in, broken windows, and fallen trees and power lines. The street leading down to the back of the police station contains two more inhabited houses and three more decaying wrecks, and the city tore all the pavement on it up last January to fix the pipes and hasn't paved it again yet. Across the other street (we live on the corner) is a big clot of densely-populated midcentury apartment buildings, whose retired inhabitants risk their lives on the above-mentioned poorly-maintained ripped-up road in winter (it's a steep hill).

Because our town is rural and the driving age for cars is 18 in Finland, the plague of Parsby (and small towns everywhere) is teenagers on mopeds. The music of the evening in Parsby starts with wood pigeons, thrushes, and the distant buzzing of cars on the highway, but is interrupted periodically by the deafening roar of mopeds speeding by under the window and teenagers practicing being cool and adult by shouting the equivalent of "FUCK" at each other. (I fantasize several times a week about an externally-mounted loudspeaker that would play a voice yelling "Shut up" towards the street.)

It would've been impossible to quickly walk to the store from Levo, though.

The Ambulance Merry-Go-Round

Aug. 4th, 2025 09:45 pm
cimorene: A painting of a large dragon flying low over an old pickup truck on a highway (dragon)
[personal profile] cimorene
My dad (C5/6 quadriplegic wheelchair user) has been in and out of the hospital all spring and summer.

Initially, there was some kind of internal bleeding, I think, and he kept having very low blood pressure and cardiac events and then having to have his many medications adjusted. Then he had to have a colectomy, and then he got a persistently recurring UTI that is resistant to antibiotics. A lot of these times he's been carted off to the hospital it's been for low blood pressure or a slight fever, and it seems to my sister and me like they're just stabilizing him, tweaking his medication, and releasing him, sometimes the same day, only for him to be back in an ambulance in less than a week.

This is having a weird effect where it's cumulatively and abstractly more scary every time he goes, while at the same time it is becoming so familiar that it's starting to feel routine. I know this is why people got convinced they were safe from COVID after a few months of wearing a mask and why people are frequently injured in the streets near their homes: the cognitive illusion that an action is proved safe if you've done it a bunch of times and nothing bad happened. Or in the case of these hospital visits, bad things happened, but he didn't get seriously (ICU) ill.

It's rough on my sister, who lives with her husband and my parents in the US, and I can't really support her long distance very effectively. And even if it were safe to travel there now, there's no way to know how long it would keep happening, so it still wouldn't probably be practical for me to go.

(no subject)

Aug. 4th, 2025 10:15 am
southernmedicine: (all things considered)
[personal profile] southernmedicine
Been several days since I've updated, it's just been A Lot.

Seattle was fine, no tsunami. Which was great, because we had planned to take the ferry from the harbor to Bainbridge Island, which we did. We saw lots of jellyfish floating in the water, and a couple of seals, but the island itself didn't really have much going on save for the wild huckleberries growing everywhere on the little trails that Blair delighted in picking and eating.

We had an amazing lunch downtown and some coffee, explored the Pike Place Market and some cute shops and whatnot. Found the gum wall, which is kinda cool but also absolutely disgusting. The place we got our coffee from was right there, and sold gum for fifty cents for the express purpose of adding your own to the wall (which we did, of course).

After dinner, we headed out, with the aim of getting about halfway to my parent's place for the light, and found a great little remodeled motel that we honestly regretted only getting one night in.

Had breakfast in a local mom and pop place (literally called Mom and Pop's Diner) in an old train car, endured mild homophobia from some of the other patrons, then stopped for Crumbl cookies and headed to Clarkston. It was lots and lots of flat farm land for most of the trip, and we drove through a lightning storm to get there.

I was a little nervous about seeing my parents for the first time in six years, and of introducing Blair to them, but they adored her. I was overjoyed to see the dogs and they were overjoyed to see me. We spent time with their horse, feeding her and brushing her. They took us to dinner.

The next day, my mom took us to an adorable cafe for drinks and pastries to wait for my car to get a little maintenance at a local mechanic, then we all went up into the mountains to forage mushrooms and pick berries and look for animals. We saw a bunch of deer and a whole herd of elk. Watched a movie together that night, then had to leave early the next morning.

Insanely long drive through endless mountain range. It rained a lot too, sometimes pouring so bad that visibility was nil and we had to pull over and wait for it to let up so we could keep driving. It was a little harrowing, but we made it through Idaho and into Montana, where we had a quick lunch in Missoula (Hi Hank Green!) and ended up somewhere in Butte for the night.

Back on the road again first thing in the morning, onto Yellowstone! What a drive that was, once we got into the park. We saw geysers and beautiful spring pools that were thermal vents. We saw tons of bison, often shocking y close and a little too much so for comfort. We saw some deer, an elk, some ravens and groundhogs and chipmunks. No wolves, even though we were in the park after dark, but we did hear them howling and that was exciting for me. The views were truly spectacular.

Because the bison kept blocking the road and holding up traffic, we were in the park much later than planned. We had to brave hours of mountain roads in the dark, late at night, often jumpscared by deer or loose cattle in or on the side of the road. It was awful.

But we saw a shooting star, or maybe a meteor, over one of the mountain passes that was pretty incredible.

We finally found somewhere to stay for the night, long after midnight, and Taco Bell saved the day as it was the only place with food open, and we hadn't eaten in way, way too many hours.

Now it's the final day and we have like twelve hours of driving to do in order to reach Blair's parent's place tonight, because we didn't get as far as we had planned yesterday. It's going to be rough and it's going to be long but we have to get there tonight because we sign paperwork for the apartment and get our keys at 8:30 tomorrow morning, and after that Blair actually had to go to work, and I have to handle the movers.

Captain's log supplemental

Aug. 2nd, 2025 11:31 am
bill_schubert: (Default)
[personal profile] bill_schubert
I'll save everyone from the pictures but Dana's sutures kind of surfaced on her hip from her 1 May surgery.  It was very uncomfortable and, well, the sutures were working their way out!!  It was just not right.

We have pretty much fired her first doctor.  He is borderline incompetent and pretty much just says everything is fine as the room is burning down.

The guy we're seeing now is, I think, the senior Ortho in the med group.  He's a good guy.  No nonsense and thoroughly competent.  

He took one look at the situation, said 'we need to fix this' and proceeded to grab the tools to pull out the sutures and other tissue that was dead or dying.  The whole thing looks like someone took a nine iron and left a divot when they hit the golf ball off her hip but the indications of infection and left over sutures and all the rest are gone now.  He gave us some hospital grade bandaging material, enough to last a week, and told me to change it twice a day and gave Dana some antibiotics.

I feel like we've crossed the last but one hurtle now.  The last one is to get her walking around more and more and more.  Not her forte.

But she is much more comfortable and doesn't feel like some version of Alien is going to pop its head out of her hip.

So

Whew.  Finally some good healing.

I'm way more skeptical about medicine than I used to be.

Saturday

Aug. 2nd, 2025 11:11 am
bill_schubert: (Default)
[personal profile] bill_schubert
 I went to see the vet today.  Zoe stayed home.  The vet and I had a good talk and I feel a lot better.  We switched Zoe from trazodone to Zannex to see if that doesn't work to help her sundowners problem.  She has had a couple of evenings when she just could not settle down and just walked the house in circles panting with anxiety.  I kept giving her more and more trazodone until it finally knocked her out.  The vet says Zannex might do the trick so we've got a couple of weeks of trial.

I also made reservations for them to spend four nights in the vet's spa in October while we're in Massechusetts.  One more checked off box.

Zoe, Toby and I just got back from a walk around the block.  It was late morning after having gone to the vet but it is important for them both to get out and travel some.  They both did fine despite what I see now is nearly 90 degrees (at 11 AM).  The heat is so late this year.  We've been lucky but we're in the hot mouth of summer now.

So my labors today from now will be in the blessed AC.

I received my new Eero 7 mesh router yesterday so I'm going to hook it up.  I need to change up where the primary wired run ends up so I've actually got to do some netork cable replugging and testing.  It will end up with the primary router in the central part of the house and the only secondary connected directly to my PC.  Finger's crossed it will work without the usual weirdness that computer hardware creates.  Eero typically has it down pretty well and has good support so I'm not too worried.

Other than that I'm just resting and.. well, resting.  
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